Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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