dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
