yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Shame is for Republicans.
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