I must be too annoying 4 u.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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