I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
