i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
