Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
