There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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