giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Randomize
