I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
