But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I need water and some morals
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
