I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
