can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
