Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
