I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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