We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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