sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
