Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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