My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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