omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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