Your dad touched me again.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I can feel your judgement through the phone
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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