It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
