the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
