wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We don't watch enough power rangers
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
