Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize
