i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
