its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
