Plan B is the new Plan A
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
