Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
