OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
