how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
