Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize