the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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