I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
