Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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