Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
