Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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