Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I'm going to jail i love you
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
you're hired as official boob wrangler
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
