I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
