Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
