I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
