He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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