I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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