i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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