who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize