Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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