no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
is wine microwaveable?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
