Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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