I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
