U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I can't put those talents on a resume
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize